Wednesday, January 9, 2008

A Love Letter

For the longest time I remeber people bragging about their children saying oh Billy did this and Bobby said this and little Suzy is sooooo smart. I thought to myself I would never be that kind of bragger and yet I find myself bragging daily about the accomplishments of my 4 amazing children. I have realized that when the parents are bragging they are just telling people how much THEY LOVE THEIR CHILDREN. Maybe they need to stop trying to convince other people and start telling their children how much they truly love them and how proud they are. Someday I plan to give this blog to my children. I want them to know step by step the first few years of their lives and someday soon I am going to chronicle the whole polish adoption process for Austin and when I do I want them to know how much I loved and love them. So these are love letters to my children:


I know sometime I'm short with you. I don't spend as much time telling you I love you as I do yelling at you. The truth is I look at those beautiful hazel eyes and I melt. I see this incredible young man who is so smart and inquizative and I think what did I do to deserve such an amazing child. You see I know you where sent to us. You may have not come from my belly but you definately came from my heart. Your father and I prayed for a special child to love and care for and God sent us you. I want you to know I wouldn't change anything. If I had to go back to Poland and start all over again I would do it in a heart beat. Be patient with me, I am doing the best I can. I promise someday it will get better. Your brothers will be more independent and you and I can start our dates again. I love you so much I am so glad you are my son.

Your Mother


I look at you and think what will he be when he grows up, a doctor, a lawyer, a husband, a father, all the above or something completely different. All I know is you will be someone amazing. You have this quiet intensity that leads me to believe your contiplating taking over the world. My incredibly beautiful child know that your Mommy lives and breathes for you. I can't believe that someone so incredible came from my body. You look at me like I have all the answers, I don't. I will make mistakes and have all the wrong answers but I will try my best to be the best Mom I can be. I love you so much and I am so glad that you are also my son.

Your Mother


My perfect angel. When I'm feeling bad or sad I take one look at you and I feel the love. You make me smile like I never have before. You are so smart that I know you will be independent before your brothers. You won't need me like they do and that scares me. For now I will soak in every moment with you. Every croked smile I will cherish, every giggle every smerk. You are a piece of my heart that I can never put into words. I can't imagine you not in my life. You are what I created and I promise you all of me, always.I love you so much and I'm so glad you are also my son.

Your Mother


I am so in love with you. That amzing little giggle turns me back into a child. I want to eat you up. You are so innocent, so beautiful, so perfect. Everything anbout me and your father that is good. I know you are going to be so strong when you grow up. You have come such a long way already I see only amazing things in your future. You, your brothers and your father are the loves of my life. I love you so muchand I'm so glad that you are also my son.

Your Mother

I hope you all understand that your father and I are doing the best that we can. Our love is so strong yet we will make bad desions along the way. All we can do is our best to give you all you need. I will do my part by teaching you to love and respect everyone around you. I will protect you the best I can and my love will never change for you. You are now and will always be the best things that have ever happened to me.

Weeks 19 & 20

Coming Soon Christmas 2007 Pics....
Maxim 12lbs 15oz, Emerson 13lbs 15oz, Alexander 13lbs They're HUGE!!!!!
Austins Christmas Concert...He sang like an Angel
Mommy, Austin and Max....It was the babies first outing

Weeks 19 & 20

HAPPY NEW YEAR! This has been an interesting year already and we are only a little over a week in. The boys are all growing like weeds. My big boy is going to be 5 in just about a month and it got me reflecting on his first 5 years and how fast they went. I can't believe he is going to be 5 already. It seem like yesterday he was saying "mamadada" yes all jumbled like that. And now he says thing like "I can't help asking questions like that, I'm just inquisitive like that." Yes he said "inquisitive". Who says things like that, no 5 year old I ever met. We got his paperwork for Kindergarten and I almost cried. Is he really ready for Kindergarten already? Where did the time go? Was I here? Did I miss it? I feel a little lost when it comes to him. He has truly learned to press my buttons and test my patients. I know it's because he is jealous. I know I was when my sisters where born and I was 12 and 14 years old. It must be devastating for Austin to have 3 babies taking up all Mommy and Daddy's attention. My poor son. We are trying to spend more time with him but sometimes there aren't enough hours in the day. I look up and it's midnight and I still haven't done laundry and there are sweet potatoes on the carpet. My big baby is growing up and I feel like I am missing it.

We had a scary time this week. Alex ended up with an staph infection in his surgical wound. I was unaware that you could get an infection months after surgery. But you can. The Dr. said he would need surgery to explore where the infection came from. Well, we prayed and prayed and much to our surprise he didn't need surgery. The infection is healing and everything seems to be fine. We will still have to keep an eye on him for a while but he looks like he's on the road to recovery!

A little update on the boys progress as preemies. The most amazing things have been happening. They are all holding up their heads very well. Sometimes Alex's center of gravity gets the best of him but in general he is doing fine. Emerson is trying desperately to sit up. He loves to sit between your legs with his legs crossed. They all reach for their toys and are interacting with the toys that make noise. They all seem to have favorite toys. Emerson has a monkey that he has to have. Alex loves his turtle to chew on and recently Max got a giraffe that is also a flashlight. He chews on it and talks to it. Speaking of talking, all the babies coo and say AHHH GOO. Alex and Emerson started the KKKAAAA in the back of their throats(David says this will help them with the German language). Max has his own language he says OOOHHHH several times and just yesterday started saying UT OH! It's very funny to hear someone so little say Ut oh over and over. Max is also the one who is very strong. He already stands straight up. You can hold both hands and he will go from laying down to standing up. The physical therapist says they are all doing well considering they are only 12 weeks corrected, meaning they should technically only be 12 weeks old. Preemies don't usually do things at the same pace as full term babies. But they are catching up quickly.

As of this week we put the babies in their big boy cribs and man o man am I having separation anxiety. I thought I would sleep better without them in the room with me, but I'm not. In fact I wake up at least every hour or so and have to go check on them. I can hear them on the baby monitor and technically they are only about 15 feet away from me but those two doors and and hallway seem like a million miles away.

All the babies are sleeping through the night. I've been told it's because they eat cereal before they go to bed and they stay fuller longer. Very rarely does somebody wake up before 7 am and they all seem to just eat a baba and go back to sleep. So most of the time they wake up between 9am and 11am. The 11am would be Max he is definitely the best sleeper. They still take a couple of cat naps during the day but only in short periods. They will take a 10 minute nap here or an hour there. We had a 3 hour stretch one day and I had to keep checking if they where breathing. It was freaking me out. I got two weeks worth of laundry put away. They all seem to have the same fussy time. Everyday in between 6pm-9pm they moan and groan and whine terribly. ALL THREE OF THEM. This kind of sucks because it's when their dad comes home. I think he's starting to take it personal. During the day they are angels. No problem. They don't usually sleep or eat all at once which is kind of nice but it is more time consuming. I know they are fussy during the evening because I am trying to feed Austin and get him ready for school and David is taking my attention which they hate. They seem to want me all to their selves. They are going to have such bad separation anxiety when I go to Las Vegas in February. That's right people. I am going away....alone (with my two sisters) for 4 days in February for my Daddy's wedding. I have arranged for David to have people here around the clock to help. He will only be alone in small doses. Keep him in your prayers just in case he looses his mind! He'll be fine! I hope!

Week 16-18

Max and the Sweet Potato War...He Won!
Emerson wasn't so lucky!
The War exhausted Alexander

Weeks 16-18

Wow, so much has happened in the last 2 weeks I don't even know where to start. Well, how about from the beginning. The babies first Christmas was amazing. We had a blast. They of course where clueless about the whole thing. They just smiled and cooed while we opened gifts and as people arrived on Christmas day they just seemed to enjoy all the attention. They got tons of toys and clothes and it was all very surreal. At one point I walked into the living room and it looked like a toy store had taken over. There was not one square inch of carpet showing.

The couple of weeks leading up to Christmas where spent shopping( that was interesting). I had at least one kid with me at all times. It was usually Max since he is going through a I WANT MY MOMMY phase. I don't mind except when I am alone with the kids he shows serious signs of jealousy when I pick up or feed another baby. He will scream and cry and throw whatever toy he has in his hands on the floor. If this is any sign of what there is to come....I AM SCREWED! Oh well, everyday is a learning experience. All in all it was not bad taking out one baby at a time. Most people think he is a newborn which is rather frustrating. I than explain he is 4 months old and a preemie. Then it usually leads to ...well, he is actually a triplet. People automatically want to touch him. I have had to actually do Kung Foo Mama, where I have to physically block someone from touching the baby. I am always very nice and say"It is cold and flu season, please don't touch the baby.". Most people are very nice when they find out we have triplets. I get a lot of people saying "God Bless you" or "What a Miracle". Every once and a while I get...."Better you than me" or "Poor You" or "You have your hands full". Well, all this is true it is better me than you and poor me that I only have 4 beautiful boys and not more and yes I do have my hands full and I love every minute of it. God knew what he was doing, just remember that. If we couldn't handle it they would not be here. Some of the comments are rude but I have learned to just roll with the punches. They don't get what a true miracle our babies are...all 4 of them!

The boys are growing so quick. Max is 12lbs 15oz, Alex is 12lbs 14 oz and Emerson is 13lbs 7 oz. I know, I know they are growing at light speed. Well, not so light. My back is killing me! They are starting to scoot around on their backs. You know when you lay them on the floor and they push their legs so they drag their heads. Max is the best at it . He can go a good 4 feet before his head starts to hurt. We gotta watch them because they should be rolling over any second! God help us, they will be crawling and than all heck will break loose.

They have started to eat food which explains the rapid weight gain. Cereal mixed with either a vegetable or fruit...yum! They love their veggies but only if they are orange. Sweet potatoes and carrots seem to be their favorite. They do not like anything green. Green beans and peas seem to be their enemies. They gag and spit them out. There is no accounting for taste I guess. They are not huge fans of fruit. They seem to prefer apples and bananas to peaches and prunes. They must be to acidic. Anyway they seem to love most of t.They are already eating twice a day.

Emerson got put on Reflux medication finally. He was having a terrible time with acid reflux. I felt so bad for him, he would have acidic puke coming out of his nose. But with the medication these spells are few and far in between. I did however have to ween him off the breast. I think my breast milk affected him t much. This has been a very depressing time for both him and I. I am still nursing the other two but I am down to only once a day with each. All though I love the time with my babies and the bonding the nutritional value is diminishing. They are almost 5 months old and they will be getting teeth soon. I need to have them completely weened by then. I don't want to be a teething ring. I plan to be totally done by the time they are six months old which will be February 17th.